


Life Worth Living

by wickedblack



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bisexual James Potter, F/F, F/M, Good Regulus Black, James Ships Wolfstar, M/M, Marauders' Era, Pansexual Sirius Black, Pining Regulus, Pining Sirius Black, Remus Lupin & James Potter Friendship, Remus Lupin & Lily Evans Potter Friendship, Sirius Black & James Potter Friendship, Sirius Black & Lily Evans Potter Friendship, Sirius Has a Crush on Remus, Sirius and Marlene are Bestfriends, Sirius and Regulus Brotherly Love, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-30 16:34:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17227523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wickedblack/pseuds/wickedblack
Summary: After falling through the Veil, Sirius gets a second chance at life, but it is common knowledge that things never happen the same way twice.





	Life Worth Living

 

 

 

He had thought countless times about the way he would die. He had come up with thousands of different scenarios, each worse than the last. For many years, he had been so sure that he would be Kissed. Part of him had longed for it, just so that the loneliness and never-ending suffering would stop. However, never in his thirty-five years of life had he thought that he would die the way he actually died. He had to admit that it beat all of his personal scenarios in the way that it was the most preposterous of them all. He had been so happy lately, he had almost had his old life back. The best thing was that he had somehow managed to build a proper relationship with his godson but dear Bella had ripped that away from him before it could bloom to its full potential.

 

He managed to catch one last glimpse of Harry’s face, he seemed so shocked and broken, before he felt himself slip through.

 

He couldn’t feel anything. He had heard countless people say that death was painless, death was supposed to feel blissful, peaceful. He only felt emptiness. He felt completely empty and utterly alone. He wondered whether he was trapped, whether he would ever get to feel the bliss people talked about, if this was what the Veil did to one’s soul, trapped itinto emptiness until it eventually vanished into thin air, never to reappear ever again. He was doomed to remain alone forever, that seemed to have been his fate all along.

 

His thoughts wandered back to Harry. He knew that he would never be able to forgive himself for abandoning him. He had lost so many people already, he didn’t deserve to lose one more. Sirius would forever blame himself for it. He thanked Merlin that Remus would still be there for him. Harry would need him now.

 

His thoughts of Harry brought back memories of James, of their time together during and after Hogwarts. He missed his bestfriend dearly, more than anyone, more than his own brother. He remembered how happy he felt back then, that had been the best time of his life. He had always longed for it, ever since that fateful night when he had lost two his bestfriends, had been betrayed by one and abandoned by another. He didn’t blame Remus, he could never blame Remus but he had felt abandoned nonetheless.

 

He longed for the nights they spent together, just him, James and Remus. Not Peter, never Peter, never again. He was the one person he could never forgive, not in this lifetime or any other.

 

He remembered one particular night, it was in the beginning of their seventh year if he remembered correctly, mid-September. It had only been him, James and Remus that night, no Peter. Lily, Marlene and Dorcas had been there as well. It had been fun. He had kissed Remus that night, on a dare, but he had kissed him anyway. They had never mentioned it again afterwards but he knew that Remus had kissed back. James knew it as well. He had dared mention it once but Sirius had quickly shut him up, not wanting to ruin things between him and Remus.

 

The only thing he had in mind was the way Remus’s lips had felt on his own, before he felt his consciousness slip away.

 

 

 


End file.
